Was It All Just A Dream?
Joleen was surprised to smell the heavenly aroma of bacon and eggs when she stepped inside the house after a rare overnight shift at the hospital. She tiptoed into the kitchen. She saw Jack tending to the eggs, relaxed. Then she stiffened. Why was he outfitted in nice slacks and a crisp white shirt and a loosened silk tie tucked underneath the “LET ME MAKE IT!” kitchen apron?
Jack looked up and smiled brightly. “Oh hi, hon! I know you must have worked hard last night, so I thought I’d rustle us up some bacon and eggs and have breakfast with you before I go to work.”
“Jack, are you okay? Why are you dressed up, going to work? Why did you stop talking after a simple declarative sentence? What about motor oil? Valvoline? Quaker State? Oatmeal?”
“Huh? Motor oil? Are you sure YOU’RE okay? Must have been a rough night in ER. Here, sit down, darlin’.”
Joleen kept standing and stared at him a few seconds before saying, “Jack, seriously, this isn’t like you … well, it used to be like you, but not lately. Are you SURE you’re okay? Tell the truth!”
“Well, let me think. No. Honestly, I haven’t been up long. Slept well. I stumbled a bit coming out of the shower, but no biggie. It’s true I don’t make breakfast very often – well, hardly at all. Did that surprise you? You know, throw you off kilter a little/?”
“No, but I’m really confused. You’re making sense. Stop making sense!” She smiled, “Remember when we used to listen a lot to that Talking Heads album, Stop Making Sense? Oh, how we loved that song, ‘Watching the days go by – flowing underwater, flowing underwater…’
“Oh, yes, we’d dance and dance, then make love. Where’s that album? Oh, wait – I have to get to work. Maybe tonight?” He gave a devilish little grin.
“Go to work? You just can’t waltz in there after so long away. They’ll want to know where you’ve been.”
“Where I’ve been? What do you mean?”
Joleen had an idea. “Jack, what’s the last thing you remember about yesterday?”
“Yesterday? Hmmm…oh yeah, I fixed the shingles on the roof, and you were so worried about it! Ha Ha!”
Joleen sat down, flabbergasted. “Jack, we need to talk. I’m off tomorrow. We’ll talk when you get back.”
Jack groaned inwardly. It was never a good omen when a woman says we need to talk. He smiled brightly, “Sure, darlin’! See you then!”
That evening after dinner, Joleen led Jack to the couch with scotch and sodas. Jack did not expect the drinks since Joleen had been unusually subdued during dinner. He hoped it was a good sign.
“So! How was your day at work, hon?” She almost said your first day back at work, but caught herself.
“Oh, the usual. Coupla sales, meetings.”
Joleen slumped a little.
“Clara’s birthday is today, so cupcakes all around. Red velvet cupcakes. You know, cupcakes are a big deal these, whole businesses built around them.”
Joleen perked up – was he about to go on a ramble? But no, he stopped.
“Jack, I know this may sound weird, but could you sing that old Elvis song, Love Me Tender, to me? Please?”
“Huh? Seriously? You know I can’t sing. You’re always asking me not to sing along with the hymns in church when I’m standing right next to you.”
“Please?”
“Okay, here goes – Love Me Tender, Love Me Do,,,”
Truly, he sounded like a frog croaking in distress. “Okay, enough! You can stop now.”
They sat in silence for a couple of minutes.
“So, how was your day?” Jack asked, just to start up the conversation again. He sensed something was off.
“Oh, you know. Sometimes I wish I would bump my head on something, knock some sense into me, or send me into another dimension, you know?” She paused a few seconds, then suddenly blurted, “Oh, Jack, stand up, will you? Please?”
“Well …okay.” He stood up somewhat hesitantly, confused.
“Oh my god! Where’s the erection? Where’d it go?” She sounded almost frantic.
So that’s what it is, he thought. She just needs some attention, the kind only he could give her.
“Oh, darlin’ it hasn’t gone far. Why, in fact I think it’s comin’ round right about now, know what I mean?” He took her hand.
“Oh, Jack, now…” But she felt she had let it go too far to back out now. She would let it happen and try to figure what was going on later. Was she mad? No, no, don’t go there. Just let it happen.
They made love. He was enthusiastic, thank God. She lay still, staring at the ceiling.
Copyright © Johnny Clack 2022
Short Shorts 